Life quotes by Xiaxue

I've read Xiaxue's blog since I was in secondary school. She is no doubt a controversial figure, who appears in the headlines for the wrong reasons many of the times. However, something about her got me thinking a few days back.

Many people do hate her, but why do many more people like her? Because she dares to speak her mind? Donald Trump was also speaking his mind when he called for America to ban Muslim immigrants. Roosh V was also speaking his mind when he says rape ought to be made legal so women will be more careful about their existence. Both Trump and V were internationally condemned, and rightfully so. So what about Xiaxue then, who has spoken her fair share of nasty stuff over the years? (I'm one of those who like her, but I have never really thought about why)

Personally, I think I have found out the reason why.

Xiaxue speaks from her personal capacity as a human being, an individual. She doesn't claim to be an authority on any issue, but rather, she's just another individual amongst millions of others who are sharing their opinions online, albeit one who is tremendously successful at it. But more importantly, when she does get called out for the controversial stuff she says, she grabs the bull by its horns and takes 100% responsibility for the things she says. 

No nonsense like trying to disguise her words as being a "joke" or "satire". No hiding behind the "freedom of speech" flag like a coward and whining that her critics aren't going after someone much worse than her. No, she addresses her criticisms straight on and writes logical explanations about why she has the opinions she does, backed with solid evidence. And this is what I personally feel marks the difference between a truly honest and responsible blogger, and someone like Roosh V who completely deserves the hate he is getting. This is what makes me like her.

Sometimes I feel that her "bad side" has been blown up disproportionately by mainstream media and alternative, pro-opposition news sites. I do not blame them, because blog wars and sagas are what make for interesting headlines. However, seeing as many of the people who hate her presumably do not follow her blog, and only dislike her because she is more well-known for the drama she creates in the blogosphere, I just thought I might compile some of my favourite quotes from her blog/FB posts over the years.

No, I do not agree with everything she says. I don't agree with what she did to Dawn Yang. But bloggers are not politicians- just ordinary people getting their views heard and getting recognised for it. And I feel that becoming so successful in blogging and earning so much by just showcasing her life online takes a certain level of streetsmarts and social media savviness that many of us will never have, and this should be respected. You don't have to agree with what they do for a living- you always have the choice to ignore/unfollow if you don't like them.

So here's presenting... the better stuff from Xiaxue that never makes the headlines. :)

On gay rights and gay marriage

“If you think about it logically, who will be better parents? Parents who actually WANT a child... They thought things through and decided that they are ready to be parents, they are ready to take on the responsibility. They made their decision because they are financially able, and their relationship is stable. (Rhymes!)

OR...

Parents who stupidly shoot the sperm inside and accidentally got pregnant so they hastily get married and begrudgingly keep the child? Even if they have only been dating for a month, or if they don't have the financial capability to raise a kid?... Gay parents will always be the former, because their sexual urges will never mistakenly result in a baby.”

“Gay people already have it pretty bad with coming to terms with themselves, realising they are different, not being able to get married, straight men being uncomfortable around them (for the guys), dads disowning them (also for gay dudes, not so much lesbians), not being able to hold hands publicly, cannot apply for HDB flats, being discriminated by relatives etc...AND THEY SO DO NOT NEED PEOPLE LIKE CALLING THEM FREAKS AND TELLING THEM THEY CAN BE CHANGED BACK TO 'NORMAL'!”

“I never understood why homosexuals are often so proud of their orientation, because straight people sure ain't proud of being straight. But I think it is a response to the suppression they receive. It is like You think I should be straight? Fuck you I'd wear glitter pants and be gayer than ever. In your fucking face.”

(To people against gay marriage): “If you find (gay marriage) disgusting, it is easy to also decide that it is wrong, sick, and shouldn't be allowed. And that the people who like it, must be either crazy, perverse, ignorant, or has to be 'fixed' in some way. (But) just because you find celery disgusting doesn't mean other people shouldn't be allowed to eat it. A mature person separates his emotions from his judgement. Being an emotional person, I still wish there are laws against all the things I dislike (ban parsley and crocs), but a small part of me knows that isn't right.”

On makeup and plastic surgery

“PLEASE LEH........ FUCKING NATURAL BEAUTY... THAT'S UNFAIR!! People should respect fake beauties and say, 'At least you went through pain and cash to get here instead of the natural bitches who had to do nothing.' LOL!! CORRECT OR CORRECT!”

“Does (makeup) make me insecure? I've videos of me online with no makeup and no plastic surgery done. I am the same me then and now, and I'd say I'm probably one of the most confident and secure people you'd ever meet. I fuckin' love myself; that's why I'm constantly upgrading myself.”

“Most of us find a strength we've got and we try our best to improve on it. For some people it is, say, an interest in flying a fighter jet. Or being a good pianist. For some of us... we are talented in beautifying things... and what's a better canvas than your own face?”

On dealing with haters

Photo from clicknetwork

“Haters from the start told me I was stupid. I sat for the Mensa IQ test just to prove them wrong. Haters said I can never earn a living from blogging. I showed them I could, and what a great career it is. Haters said (my husband) Mike will ditch me in a week, but we are still together, 7 years and counting, a baby in the making. Haters said my blog popularity will never last - but here they are, still reading as my visitor count increases per second.”

“Few things give me more satisfaction than achieving more in life than they could ever have, and when they insult me, I can go "I am Xiaxue, who are you?"

“Haters are stupid and bitter and they wish the worst for you, never ever listen to their 'advice' and change!! They merely wish to mold everyone into default cookie cutter unoffensive sheep. Anything that you do that is out of the ordinary will get you haters.”

“Most of the time, exactly why they hate you is what makes you unique.”

“Because love me or hate me, I feel very honoured that I evoke so much emotion in you that would drive you to put in so much effort for me. You know I love attention, so thank you for giving me so much of it.”

"I will continue to shame haters and assholes who are stupid enough to leave nasty comments with their identities. I strongly believe in doing that because people believe that just because they are online they can be as vicious and hurtful as they want to, with no consequences. They keep doing it, because people keep letting them get away with it. So you tell me I look like a man/I'm fat/I'm ugly and I can't say the same about you? Why? Because I have more followers? Because I'm a mom? Because somehow as I'm more popular I'm 'asking for it'? You can hurt me publicly but I can't do the same back. Sorry, no go. Maybe other celebs will tolerate it, but I won't, and I never have."

"Every single day I am faced with the choice of whether I should use my influence to give the assholes who give me a hard time the hardest time of all. Most of the time I CHOOSE NOT TO. I go all Spiderman-movie-quote. I tell myself 'I'd give him a second chance, he didn't know better.' Most of my blog entries about individuals are those who have provoked me MANY MANY times.” 

On politics

“I hate politics. I hate that I have an opinion and a party I support. I wish I was apathetic as I was before because elections divide Singaporeans more than ever. The country is split into two groups that have so much disdain and disrespect for each other. All this vitriol and negativity will get us nowhere. I just want to like all my fellow Singaporeans again without them asking me who I support and judging my views, asking me to validate them, then thinking less of me afterwards... And have me thinking less of them in return."

“But more and more I see that Singaporeans are having attitudes that go from bad to worse. Everyday people are whining about the MRT, about the government, about how they should be somehow entitled to all sorts of privileges in life but didn't get it. Next time you feel angry at the Government, just think about all that Chiam See Tong has done for Singaporeans and feel GRATITUDE instead. Next time the MRT pisses you off, dream of earning so much you can buy a car or get chauffeured. It isn't impossible unless you say it is.”

On her blog entry on the 2011 General Elections: “I AM NOT BEING PAID BY THE PAP IN ANY WAY. If you think I can write blog entries like this without real conviction and passion, you must think very very highly of my blogging skills. And no amount of money can convince me to do harm for my own country which I love to death and intend to stay in till I DIE.”

On not contributing to charity

“As a person with power, influence and a public image, I've thought about this probably more than you have. And I've been burdened with an additional responsibility, because I can 'spread awareness'. If I don't, I'm a selfish, heartless bitch whom you wish will drop dead and die. Unlike most people who are still struggling with their dilemma of how much to give, I've made my decision, and I'm sticking to it. Here it is: NONE.”

“Sure, I feel sad about orphans. I would very much like to help bears who are in pain, with tubes stuck in them for their bile. But then I'm thinking... Why am I helping bears? My own grandma is working as a cleaner lady. I love her very much and she says her knees are hurting her. I should give her my $400 instead, monthly, so she won't have to work anymore. And then I'm thinking... My mom works so hard. She's still paying for my brother's pocket money because my brother is in the army. Should I give my brother that money? What happens in the end? My passion for my loved ones trumps those of charities and misfortunes that happen millions of miles away. Bears don't concern me. My grandma does. I'm not saying this sort of attitude is right. But we are human afterall, and we cannot help what we love and care for, and some we care for more than others. Most of all, we care for ourselves."

“I will NOT tell people to donate to charity because I feel it is not in my place to do so. Who am I to tell people to what to do when here I am in my Princess room and my $500 bunny?? What kind of asshole takes the easy way out to act kindly and just "spread awareness" instead of doing real sacrifices... while expecting others to do the shit work? Sure, it will make it seem to people that I care and that I am kind. Sure, it will make me feel less guilty about being so fortunate that one of the hardest challenges in my life is overeating when half of the world is undereating. But will I do that just for appearances? No. I already said I've come to terms with who I am. Whether you like this or not that's your business.”

On being a mother

Photo from scene.sg

“My own mother told me that her breasts got so engorged they were stone hard and it was even more painful than childbirth for her. I wasn't breastfed, she gave up after 2 days. I can almost hear the disapproval from other moms who endured their stone hard breasts and persevered, but don't you dare judge my mother - she worked 3 jobs raising my brother and me, nobody can say she is a bad mom.”

“No wonder so many mothers go into depression... Already we give up so much for our children, but yet people keep burdening us with more unrealistic expectations, guilt-tripping us into thinking we don't give up enough. Stop it already. Stop saying things like 'If you not willing to give up xxx, perhaps you shouldn't be a mother.' Nobody can give up everything that used to make them happy and not go crazy or depressed, and I'm sure you agree a psycho person won't make a good mother either.”

“We all know that becoming a mum already means sacrificing a lot. Raising a child takes up so much time and energy that could otherwise be dedicated to a better career or our life's dreams. As it is we are already sacrificing a lot. What I don't get is why these stupid people all around insist that everyone should be inflicted with unnecessary additional pain!”

"My haters love to say that I am a lazy, irresponsible mom. Already somehow people got the impression that my mother was doing all the hard work taking care of (my son) Dash while I tralala skip off to do my nails. Now that I've got a maid I'm gonna get it worse. Well, this is what I have to say to these haters: FUCK YOU. Until you become a mom and know how tough it is, please stfu. Getting a maid wasn't so I can be an absentee mother, it's so I can be a BETTER one. So I can earn more for his secure future, so I can have energy to play with him, read to him, bring him out for activities etc without feeling like I wanna sleep for the next thousand years.”

On ethics in the media industry

On her saga with a rival company Gushcloud: "At the end of the day, my exposé was never about Nuffnang VS Gushcloud. Nor Nuffnang bloggers vs Gushcloud bloggers. It was about unethical practices in the industry. After my post, you will find that one thing is definite: AGENCIES AND BLOGGERS WILL NOW BE MORE CAREFUL ABOUT INFLATING STATISTICS. That kind of increased honesty can only be good for my industry, and that's all I wanted. Fair play. And I believe I achieved it. I believe I did good. That was my end game."